Even though you care deeply for our partner, why do we end up hurting them? Adult relationship dynamics are complex and often intertwine different love languages, attachment patterns, and both conscious and unconscious dynamics. This blog post will focus on why these patterns repeat and explore how individual therapy for recurring relationship issues can help you heal.
Why Does This Keep Happening to Me?
This is a valid question that may have many answers. Some of these answers may stem from how your caregivers raised you and the interactions you observed growing up. Other variables may include whether you were cheated on in the past, experienced sexual trauma, or experienced domestic violence in your life. All of these life events, and there are more that aren’t listed here, can influence how we relate and interact with those we love.
The above examples can create different challenges in your life when in a relationship. From self-doubt or critical thoughts leading to self-sabotaging behavior to emotional numbness to protect yourself from being vulnerable. Other ways that unconscious behaviors can present are by presenting as fear of something unknown or creating turmoil in relationships due to getting ‘too close’ to someone you care about. All these factors can influence how we show affection or interact with those we care deeply for.
Is It Me or the Relationship?
This can be a humbling question that takes a level of internal reflection to understand. All relationships have their issues; however, if issues stem from one person, they will transcend into future relationships if left unresolved. Patterns will always repeat themselves if left unhealed. The good news is that you can begin to heal and change for the future.
How Do I Begin to Change?
There are many things you can begin to do to change. This is a mental health therapy blog, so obviously, I recommend individual therapy to begin healing. Specifically, somatic experiencing therapy can be very beneficial to undue conscious and unconscious behavior patterns. This can also be a great way to heal from previous guilt, shame, trauma, and emotional numbness that can occur at any time in life.
At Revitalize Mental Health PLLC, I utilize somatic experiencing therapy to help you become the best version of yourself. You can read more here about somatic therapy. At this time, I am accepting new clients. You can reach out to me by clicking on this link here or by calling 720.295.6703 and leaving me a voicemail.
I have found that in-office therapy sessions work best for those who live near Kenosha, Pleasant Prairie, Somers, Union Grove, and Franklin, Wisconsin. Telehealth therapy sessions work best for those who live throughout Wisconsin and/s Colorado.
